Ep. 215: Oren Jay Sofer — How to Find More Peace and Less Suffering in Your Life

by Seth Gillihan, PhD

My guest this week is Oren Jay Sofer.

Topics we discussed included:

  • Oren’s new book, Your Heart Was Made for This
  • The ways that our minds and hearts are shaped by the world
    • Scarcity
    • Separation
    • Depletion
  • Understanding the roots of suffering and how to relieve suffering
  • Our mistaken belief and wish that consumption will finally provide ultimate fulfillment and satisfaction
  • Oren’s realization at a young age that all of life is in flux
  • Common effects of social media use, and what drives it
  • How becoming a dad while writing his most recent book affected Oren and how he sees the world
  • Finding unconditional love and acceptance
  • My guest’s experience of persistent Lyme Disease
  • Finding a kind of joy that doesn’t depend on our conditions
  • The inseparable nature of joy and sorrow
  • The joy that comes from living in alignment with the truth
  • Embracing the mess of our lives, just as they are

Oren Jay Sofer teaches Buddhist meditation, mindfulness, and communication internationally.

He holds a degree in comparative religion from Columbia University and is a Certified Trainer of Nonviolent Communication and a Somatic Experiencing Practitioner for the healing of trauma.

Born and raised in New Jersey, Oren is the author of several books, including the best-selling title Say What You Mean: A Mindful Approach to Nonviolent Communication along with his latest, Your Heart Was Made for This.

His teaching has reached people worldwide through online communication courses and guided meditations. Oren lives in the San Francisco Bay Area with his wife and son, where he enjoys cooking, spending time in nature, and home woodworking projects.

Find Oren online at his website and connect with him on TwitterFacebook, and Instagram.